Toxic Sludge Is Good For You

Are you guys really drinking this “Vitamin Water” shit? If you are, please stop. Despite the marketing that would suggest that you’re drinking regular bottled water that’s been “enhanced”, it’s really just Kool-Aid with a multivitamin in it. Take a look at the ingredient list for “Charge” :

Vapor distilled, deionized water and/or reverse osmosis water, crystalline fructose, citric acid, monopotassium phosphate (electrolyte), ascorbic acid (vitamin C), natural flavor, dipotassium phosphate (electrolyte), magnesium lactate (electrolyte), gum acacia, calcium lactate (electrolyte), niacin (B3), ester gum, pantothenic acid (B5), pyridoxine hydrochloride (B6), b-carotene (color) cyanocobalamin (B12)

Just like any other soft drink, the first two ingredients are water and sugar. Here’s what the trade group “The Sugar Association” says about “crystalline fructose” :

Crystalline fructose is produced by allowing the fructose to crystallize from a fructose-enriched corn syrup.

Now if that corn syrup were of the “high fructose” variety instead of being “fructose-enriched”, would it stop being a health drink?

Even more revealing is how Glaceau (and parent company Coca-Cola) use the oldest trick in the book to blur the drink’s nutritional value :

Serving size: 8 fl oz, Servings per container: 2.5; Amount per serving: Calories: 50;

Which, assuming you aren’t one of the few who only drinks 8oz of the 20oz bottle, gives you a calorie count of 125 (barely more than Coca-Cola’s 140 calories per can).

On their website, Glaceau’s slogan is “hydrate responsibly”. Good idea. You can start by avoiding this over-hyped sugar water.